Achieving neurodiverse accessibility in social groups

Neurodiversity refers to how people's brains can perceive, process and interact with the world around them in different ways.

These differences exist due to genetic factors, and from the perspective of any individual's lived experience (how it feels from their perspective to 'exist'), differences are often invisible. They have always been there for that individual.

Neurotype can have a big impact on how people interact within social groups. For people having similar neurotypes, social interactions can feel effortless, because the expectations people hold of each other are mutually understood.

But conflicts may arise when different neurotypes interact, one person's behaviour may be confusing to another person, and this can lead to individuals having difficulty accessing, and interacting with social groups, or having their intentions misunderstood.

What does it mean to be 'neurodiverse accessible?'

The term 'accessible' used alone means something like 'we are aware of the needs of people including wheelchair users, partially sighted people, and the deaf or hard of hearing, and have provided accommodations for people with these needs.'

Extrapolating from this, the term neurodiverse accessible can be assumed to mean 'we are aware of the needs of neurodiverse people and are able to provide accommodations to support them.'

I think that many people today understand neurodiversity from the perspective of a binary split, 'normal' vs 'neurodiverse'. The reality is much more complex than this.

The process of evolution creates genetic mutations, and these can influence neurological wiring, and indirectly, behaviour, just as much as they may affect someone's physical appearance. Neurotype changes how someone fundamentally perceives the world, for example a person with Synesthesia will link different kinds of perception, perhaps perceiving a certain colour when they hear a given sound.

Historically, societal attitudes towards neurotype differences have been that the neurodiverse person is 'disordered'. I strongly disagree with this notion, and believe that differences in neurotype are a normal aspect of the human species that evolved and exist for a reason.

Evolution creates these differences, because they can be advantageous for performing certain tasks, and functioning in some environments. However, they can also lead to accessibility challenges, due to something called the double empathy problem.

The double empathy problem exists where someone has trouble holding empathy for someone of a different neurotype, because the other side is not communicating in a way they understand. This is often explained within the context of two people, one having a neurotypical neurotype, and the other an autistic neurotype, but that is an oversimplification. It can also happen between two neurotypicals, two autistics, or any other combination, should they have sufficiently different ways of perceiving the world.

A lot of the problems faced by neurodiverse people today, may be caused by the industrial revolution having normalised systems whereby everyone is expected to behave in exactly the same way, thus highlighting people that, due to genetic differences, are unable to function in that way.

Expecting neurodiverse people to change and fit in is not OK, for the simple reason that this is often physically impossible due to how they are built. Also, even if someone did want to try to change, the information and feedback that would be required to do so just doesn't exist. Differences in neurotype frequently result in people making what the other person in a communication perceives as a social mistake or faux pas.

Most people do not give feedback to social mistakes in a way that is possible to learn from. Typically people say nothing, or shut you off and refuse to talk to you. There are numerous causes that could lead to this, and knowing exactly what one did wrong is impossible given the lack of feedback.

Instead, people of all neurotypes, need to increase their awareness of the ways that other neurotypes perceive the world, behave and communicate.

Humans did not evolve to function in isolation, but for some individuals to be better at some things than others, and for people's strengths to compensate for other's weaknesses. Being neurodiverse can give individuals advantages in some contexts, by enabling them to have a unique perspective. However, it is only possible to make use of this in the correct environment.

The nature of social groups at the time of writing frequently leads to situations where neurodiverse individuals are unable to function. This can lead to years of their life passing, while they try desperately to be included in things, yet are unable to gain traction, and remain trapped in the same situation for years. Solving this problem typically requires only basic accommodations.

For any group to be neurodiverse accessible requires that all individuals in a group make a deliberate effort to understand the communication styles and needs of other people in the group, and to be able to adapt to the needs of them as much as possible.

Other access needs.

As well as potential challenges with communication misunderstandings, neurodiverse people often also have other sensitivities and access needs, which may include:

• Sensitivity to bright or flashing lights.
• Sensitivity to loud or unexpected sounds.
• Anxiety of the unknown, such as needing to know in advance what will happen at an event.
• Struggling to handle social environments with large numbers of people.
• Difficulty with task switching (monotropic vs polytropic processing *).
• Social anxiety or difficulty with initiating interactions and functioning in social situations.

This list is drawn mainly from my own experiences, and is in no way exhaustive. It would be prudent to ask the people in your group what there needs are, and do your own research into common neurodiverse challenges.

*Monotropism is a theory of the autistic neurotype whereby different people have evolved to have different attention styles. Monotropic individuals focus deeply on one thing for an extended period if time, whereas polytropic individuals prefer to change tasks frequently.

Creating a more neurodiverse accessible environment

The first thing to be aware of is that neurodiversity is diverse. There is no 'one size fits all' answer.

To be neurodiverse accessible, it is NOT enough to just follow lists or fulfil legal accessibility requirements. It is essential to have awareness of, sensitivity towards, and willingness to accommodate the needs of the people in a given group.

Solving this problem is complicated because, as noted above, differences in neurotype often cause people to communicate in ways that may not be mutually understandable. Even attempting to communicate a support need, could lead to the person's request being totally misinterpreted.

Addressing that requires a factual awareness of the ways that people with different neurotypes experience things internally. If one had that information, it could be used to educate people of one neurotype, how those of another neurotype operates. That would allow them to better understand each other, and reduce the impact of the double empathy problem.

What neurotypes exist?

As far as I am aware, current research and available information provides no clear answer to this question.

A problem that we have is that psychology as a discipline has been fixated on classifying almost all differences from a perceived 'normal', as 'disorders' or 'defects'. The majority of research done has been approached with this outlook and bias.

These existing medical classifications are also extremely vague. For example, there is a huge difference in actual 'experience of existing' between people who get lumped into the 'autistic' box. Being one myself, I can listen to other people talk about their internal experience, and in many cases there is little overlap with my own. There is no guarantee in talking to another 'autistic' person, that I will have anything in common with them at all.

In order to be able to match people who may be able to communicate effectively, or to improve inter-neurotype communication, it is necessary to be much more specific about communication and behavioural tendencies. For example, by observing the people in a group, you may notice people who:

• Act in a self-directed way by observation at a distance, and work things out by themselves.
• Morph to align with what the other people within a group are doing, tending to be externally motivated and seeking to fit in, holding less emphasis on themselves and their own interests.

I see a neurotype as a collection of behavioural tendencies of this kind. If you observe the people within a given group, you'll notice that some individuals will tend to behave in certain predictable ways. Paying attention to these kinds of things would allow one to identify people within a group who behave similarly, and who may be able to get along with each other.

Similarly, if an individual observes their own behavioural and communication tendencies in relation to other people, it would be possible to notice areas where their approaches differ from those of other people.

Differences in communication approach manifest organically due to people processing the world in different ways. For instance, someone who's neurotype is more analytical may approach social interaction by analysing how the other person is communicating in a literal sense.

Improving cross-neurotype communication

As noted previously, if one is aware of what neurotypes exist within a group and how individuals of different neurotypes tend to communicate, it would be possible to teach people how individuals of other neurotypes communicate.

Ideally, this should be presented in multiple ways, with each using wordings that make sense to a given neurotype, and which communicates how other neurotypes communicate. Having this would help people understand how they themselves communicate, along with how other people communicate.

Having such mutual understanding would allow us to ask 'what neurotype are you' when talking to a new person. It would then allow one to know what to expect when interacting with them.

Because these behavioural differences are caused by differences in neurology, it may be the case that there are people who can never understand each other, due to their internal processes being to different.

Understanding communications: do not assume that something interpreted as negative was intended to be negative

The strongest advice I can offer regarding neurodiverse accessibility, is to make a deliberate effort to understand the people you have in the group, and to never assume that a communication interpreted as negative was intended to be negative.

There is a good chance that someone who is 'complaining' or appears adversarial is making a cry for help in the only way they know how. Some for example may state 'I find approaching people difficult', meaning 'can you help me with being involved in social interactions'.

Make an effort to understand what the person is trying to communicate, and ask questions if needed.

Supporting people in a group

Becoming aware of support needs of the people in a group

Once one has a solution to communicating between neurotypes, it is possible to start trying to understand the needs of the people in a group. There are a few ways this can be achieved:

• In case there are self-aware individuals within your group, this could just be a matter of asking people if they have any access needs.
• Some people may make specific support requests without your asking, and if this happens it is important to listen to, try to understand what they are requesting, and do your best to implement it.
• Though other people may not be aware of their needs. It is also very common that a given person may be neurodiverse, and be unaware of this. Remember that from the individual's perspective, differences are invisible because they have always been there for that person.

People in the last category may account for a large part of any social group. Supporting these people could be approached by passively observing them, noticing if it looks like they are struggling with something, and seeing if there is anything that could be done to help.

For all of these cases, people must feel secure in knowing that if they request help that it will be provided. For example, if someone has a physical disability and is in a wheelchair, it would be expected for reasonable accommodations to be made. Such as, they may ask for help because a path is blocked with an obstacle. This also needs to be the norm for requests relating to neurotype needs.

Also, be aware that some people may reject help even if they actually want help, due to cultural factors around feeling that asking for help shows weakness, and they do not feel safe to do this. If people can see others being supported within your group, and can see that this does not lead to harsh penalties for them, this fear should diminish over time. Generally people feel safe to do things they see happening around them.

Social introduction: an example of a support accommodation

I personally find it very difficult to approach people that I don't know, especially in new environments. For reasons I don't currently understand, other people never approach me. Due to this, I will often end up standing by myself and unable to talk to anyone. It is easy for me to go to a festival, and talk to nobody for a whole weekend, despite being surrounded by people.

If I talk about this, many people will automatically assume that i have social anxiety, but that isn't the whole story. The problem is largely that I have no idea what to say, and don't know how to approach people. The apparent social anxiety is a byproduct.

How people can help

It helps me if someone can introduce me to other people in a group. There needs to be a person I know that I can approach to request that support, and I need to know who that person is. It could include a group organiser, or someone that I already know.

Being introduced to people by another person I already feel safe with helps to overcome the initial anxiety around approaching someone. The act of introduction means that there is already a conversation I can continue.

I also find it helpful to be able to tag along with another person as they talk to other people. Being with someone else helps me to initiate conversations because the other person will naturally start conversations, I can observe what is being discussed and contribute without needing to be the one initiating or driving the interaction.

Both of these cases also allow me to observe how another person will start conversations and approach people. By physically being with someone doing the thing, I am actually practising doing the thing, within the actual context that it is going to be used.

It is important that any group that wishes to be neurodiverse accessible has the capacity to listen to someone who may request this kind of support, and for it to feel certain that the support will be provided.

Also, do not assume a person standing by themselves does not want to be involved, they may not know how to get involved.

Colliding access needs and making compromises

It is possible for the access needs of two people to collide, such that implementing an accommodation that helps one person, would make the situation inaccessible for another person.

For example, in the case of having difficulty initiating social interactions, another thing that I find helpful is to 'circle around the table' where the people in the group can individually introduce themselves and state their access needs to everyone else in the group openly. If someone had a fear of talking to a group, that activity would be inaccessible for that individual.

Another reason this may happen is that the person to whom the support request is being directed is unable to, or does not feel comfortable doing what is being asked of them.

What not to do

Something you absolutely should never do in this situation is outright reject the request of whomever requested the support accommodation. Doing this will leave them feeling rejected, and like their needs are not valid.

Better approaches

Mention that the request is valid but that it would conflict with the needs of another person or people in the group, and try to find a compromise from this point. Making this change opens up the possibility of finding a compromise, while rejecting the request immediately shuts down the conversation.

• An example of this could be to ask the group, who is OK to be introduced to new group members as discussed.
• Another thing would be to, if the person asked isn't able to act on a support request themselves, to ask other people in the group if they are able to do that thing. Over time this should lead to it being known who is happy to do what.
• Sometimes the best solution to this problem is for multiple separate groups to exist that cater for different needs.

Other things to be aware of

Expecting neurodiverse individuals to 'learn to fit in' is not OK.

I already stated this earlier, but it is important. Everyone needs to make an effort to understand other people as best as they can.

A group attended mostly by neurodiverse people is not innately 'neurodiverse accessible'

Simply being a group primarily attended by neurodiverse people, is not enough to be universally 'neurodiverse accessible'.

Neurodiversity is diverse, with different people having different communication tendencies and potentially other needs. Just because an individual would fall into the category 'neurodiverse' does not mean that this individual is aware of and knows how to accommodate the needs of all other neurodiverse people that exist, in a group or in general.

At the current time it is very common for people to not be aware of their own communication style and differences, let alone those of others in a group, and how all of these factors interact, or how to effectively support other people.

Creating a neurodiverse accessible environment requires being aware of and able to navigate many different communication styles and other needs, it does not happen by accident.

There will be neurodiverse people in a group who are not aware they are neurodiverse.

Because the differences of neurodiverse people have been there for those people's whole lives, they can only be noticed in respect to differences between one person and another.

Thus it is easy for a neurodiverse person to not be aware that they are neurodiverse, should they have happened to grow up in an environment that they can function effectively in.

Society has also been incredibly toxic towards neurodiverse people in general, creating pressure for people to hide differences, instead of working with them as strengths.

A neurodiverse group leader can inadvertently create accessibility issues

If a group is lead by a person that is neurodiverse, this alone can create accessibility issues. Many neurodiverse people are not aware of their own tendencies, or how those tenancies may impact other people.

An example of this could be someone that has demand avoidance, a tendency to reject direct requests, such as: 'can you do X for me'.

If a group is lead by someone with this trait, and someone in the group asks for an accommodation, the request will trigger the demand avoidance behaviour, and cause the leader to reject the request for support.

It is critical that a group leader is aware of their own behavioural tendencies, as well as the tendencies of others, and the potential problems that can arise from this. Doing so requires a considerable amount of effort and should not be taken lightly.

It can be very troublesome in case of a group has a leader who is neurodiverse but is not aware that they are.

How easy or difficult you find it to do something as an individual is irrelevant

In case someone asks you to help them with something that is easy for you, it can be easy to carry the assumption that the thing in question must also be easy for the other person, and thus seem odd that they are asking for help with it.

How easy you find something has no bearing on how easy someone else finds it to do something, because they are not you.

People can find things difficult, and a supportive thing to do is to either do thine thing for them, or show them how to do it in a way that makes sense to them. Note that this does not mean 'give them a logical explanation for how to do it', because this does not work for all people.

It can be helpful to just do something and let them watch. It is not needed to explain things for learning to happen. See the next point.

Show, don't explain

Some neurodiverse people learn more effectively by being shown how to do something by physically doing it with them so that they can watch, instead of explaining.

For me personally, explanations are almost completely ineffective for many things, I don't know how common this trait is though.

Be aware of things that seem helpful, but actually isolate people

It is possible for an accommodation made to seem helpful, but in reality it isolates people. To put this problem into context I'm going to use the example of a Ceilidh dance (pronounced like the name 'Kaylee').

Ceilidh dances are partnered, dances done in small groups. It is quite common at these dances for there to be an area of the room where people can go to find a dance partner, if they did not come with one.

This could appear to be a good thing for accessibility, but in practice it creates a separation between the people who went with a partner or friend group, and those that do not.

In my experience, the people who already have an established social circle will often dance with the people within this circle, while the 'partner corner' will concentrate all of the people who came alone, and/or who find social interaction difficult.

As people often go to these kinds of dance events to meet people, the segregation that happens due to the 'partner corner' limits the scope of people that someone who went to a dance alone are able to interact with. This is especially true for people who find cold-approaching other people difficult.

Another way of approaching the problem of finding a partner at a dance is to create a structure. For example, I went to a swing dance class where everyone stood in two concentric rings, leads on the outside and follows in the middle.

During the class, the follows rotated around the ring from one person to the next. This inherent structure in this broke up any social groups that existed outside of the dance, and meant that everyone in the dance was able to dance with and talk to everyone else,

This also meant that someone could get involved simply by standing at a gap between two people in the ring: the next time the ring progresses, regardless of if you join in a lead or follow position, you will have someone to dance with.

Thus, everyone is able to dance with everyone, regardless of their ability to approach people in an unstructured room.

For any accommodation that you may consider introducing, consider the impact that it has on people's ability to interact with each other. Does it give people an equal ability to interact with all of the other people in the space?

Suggested actions and closing notes

So, to summarise. I would recommend that any group that wishes to be neurodiverse accessible implements the following:

• Any group that markets itself as neurodiverse accessible should clearly state precisely what they mean by this, and what accommodations they are / are not able or willing to provide.
• Being neurodiverse accessible requires everyone to be involved. Everyone in a group must do their best to understand the others in the group.
• If someone makes a mistake in a social interaction, tell them! Communicate what it was that they did wrong, and how they can correct it. For some people explaining may work, for others, giving them concrete examples of what to say instead may be more effective.

However, neurodiverse accessibility is a complex topic, and it is not possible to create a singular universal solution to it. The points raised in this article are largely drawn from things that I have personally encountered difficulties with. The topic needs to be subject to a larger scale discussion, in order to include and understand the perspectives of many people.

I also firmly believe that a group should only advertise itself as 'neurodiverse accessible' if the people in it fully understand the points raised in this article, and are committed to putting in the work to implement them.

Without an in-depth understanding of the factors involved, a group may state that they are neurodiverse accessible, but be unable to follow through as they do not know what this entails. It is as if a group would claim that it is wheelchair accessible, while also being on the second floor without a lift.

The root-causes of the problems which lead to access challenges for neurodiverse people are due to established societal norms, and communication challenges arising from perceptual differences, themselves caused by differences in the wiring of the brain. Actually being accessible to the widest group of neurodiverse people feasible, is very complicated, and is not something that should be taken lightly or joked about.